Fun yak by name, fun yak by nature. If you’re stuck of ideas on things to do while wandering up and down the French Riveira, I’d highly recommend renting out
a little shitty boat an absolutely mental speed water wagon and cruising around the caps between Nice and Monaco.
We went from Villefranche, through a company called Dark Pelican. It seemed like a well drilled machine of a company, presumably from the dictator that sits at the desk who’s savage approach to customer service is something you mist expect from the French (although I think she’s Dutch). Booking online saved us 10%, although the prices are extremely reasonable and if you get a full house of 5 on the boat, you’re looking at around 25-30 hours for 5 hours. There’s a morning, afternoon or full day session, depending on how much of a Captain you’d like to be.
We took an afternoon slot, solely because working in a bar makes you slightly nocturnal and I need my beauty sleep hehehe. There was Rach, Big Bad Burnsy Bear, Big Bad Becky Bear and myself as the dream team on our expedition. Packed lunch at the ready and we got the bus over and set to rent the boat out. Our instructions were relayed to us by a bloke that had a strange obsession with long awkward pauses, a cheeky grin and staring right at you. Nothing strange about that right? I took the lead to get the boat out of the “harbour,” being an expert and all. After expertly guiding the fun yak 450 out and not hitting anything whatsoever, we set sail.
The 6hp engine is deceivingly powerful, said no-one ever #bants. It was a pretty slow journey and leaving Villefranche seemed like it took a few hours but I’d rather my slow journeys have views of superyachts and exotic villas, as opposed to Vauxhall Astra’s on the M6, as Burnsy bear was going to be tolerating within the next few days. Glorious, powerful sunshine burst down on you whilst feeling glamorous on a yacht (THE FUN YAK IS A YACHT OK), while in the meantime you struggle to fit in with the real big boys of the sea as you persistently shout “AHOY” to any passers by.
We moored in between Villefranche and Cap Ferrat for lunch and a well deserved dip. Our 15m anchor in waters over 1000m deep came into good effect, as the boat continuously drifted backwards into our ever cautious sea neighbours, suggesting our anchor was infact made of paper. The water was ultimately transparent and fish were gagging for the mouldy apple and bread crust we gladly donated to them. We surrendered a lot of our time to diving, playing about with the GoPro and making the boat as crumby as possible.
There isn’t that much to do out at sea unless you have a superyacht with all the gadgets within, however there isn’t a comparable feeling to cruising along the water and soaking the sun and sights. We went all the way round to Cap D’Ail before heading back, where we drifted in and out of the big boys in hope they’d want a Fun Yak as a sub boat, to their sub yachts, sub yacht. Unfortunately not, I think we need a different approach next time.
We returned the boat (thankfully) in one piece and got our deposit back. It’s 100% something I’d recommend doing out here and as the name suggests, the Fun Yak is Fun! Where’s the “Fun” in “Superyacht?” Exactly.
Oh go on, I may as well discuss the last hours of the day too. We went out for a family meal at Le Ban Thai, after hearing good things about it and it being reasonably priced as well. The positives were I for once brought my Epipen out in public, a recent situation entailed that. The food was bloody cracking. I got the special Thai Red Curry with pumpkin and it was awesome, coconut milk is such a good ingredient. The sticky rice however I would avoid, purely because you get a lot more with normal rice, it’s still quite sticky and it’s cheaper. The negatives were definitely within the service however. Although I believe it might have been a changeover of staff at the time, we didn’t get asked for a drink for a good fifteen minutes, maybe longer, as I had time to go home and retrieve my Epipen whilst we waited! Although the woman tried to make up for it later on, we were a bit bewildered with the wait to be asked anything, although the food did come quick.
Afterward I treated to Beks and Burns to the infamous Gelateria Azzurro, where they weren’t left disappointed. A quick trip to the beach to see the most stoned human beings I’ve ever witnessed fall over multiple times followed, proceeded by a trip to the park, where we were overwhelmed with the influx of people who had no lives and were spunking themselves over pokemon go. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve got the app, but to be playing it at midnight sat outside a park as there’s some pokestops there, come on guys!
All in all, a really really really good day!
Be sure to check out my instagram and youtube channel, as I start to use them both to show off our adventures!