A comprehensive list of people Seasonnaires hate

After two months of stewing this over, it has come to my attention about the recurring problematic humans that hotel/chalet workers have to deal with. If you’re planning on doing a season, please watch out for these criminals:

  • People who don’t make their beds
  • Shitting monsters. CLEAN YOUR BLOODY BATHROOM
  • The people who believe bins are myths. They are 100% real and exist. Use them.
  • Children with a naming obsessions. My name is Oliver, don’t wear it out sistaaaaa
  • Pissing monsters. CLEAN YOUR BLOODY BATHROOM
  • Sweaty teenagers – If I ever smelt like these children, I apologise to all the people I’ve offended.
  • Full can of pop wankers who deposit these full cans into their bins and it spunks all over your jazzy primark chinos.
  • Crimes against towels. Shower is not a good storage spot after it’s been on, nor is the bloody FLOOR!
  • Onesie wearing willy’s at dinner.
  • Teletubby twats. The GoPro head gear toolbags (courtesy of Jim)
  • Sleezy Italians
  • Those idiots that have 2 long pieces of metal under their feet and carve the complete entirety of the piste, cutting you up and slowing you down.
  • Those idiots that have one girthier piece of metal under their feet and sit in the middle of the piste. Sorry for abusing my own kind, we’re all guilty
  • The French, the bloody French!!
  • Italian chairlifts, got the turn of pace like an ageing Per Mertesacker.
  • Spoilt children who have been sheltered to how normal children behave! Appreciate the fact you think I’m your slave but no I’m no Jeeves sunshine
  • It is also never ok for a young man to wear just his thermal leggings. I don’t want to see your tackle pal!
  • Girls on their monthly cycle, leavibng sanitary products around
  • The “teaspoon bender’ers”
  • The classic put the chewing gum under the table gag

Anymore, please feel free to enlighten me and I am sure this list will exponentially expand as the season develops.


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