Xi’an – Mt Huashan

Key Recommendations

  • Be sure to take the taxi to the cable car if you’re wanting to do this in one day and enjoy it, more to be revealed
  • If you’re surrounded by giddy Chinese teenagers on the train, don’t fall asleep.. They will wake you and take pictures
  • TAKE A BUCKET LOAD OF WATER (it’s pretty pricey on the mountain and hiking a mountain in delirious humidity is surprisingly thirsty work)

See below for gallery


 

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A packed tube & a Jackie Chan lookalike

Xi’an was a hectic first day and even more jam packed second. Mt Huashan, one of China’s five great mountains, was our second day activity. Situated a 45 minute bullet train out of the city, Mt Huashan stands towering the skyline.. Or so we had heard, as it was impossible to see because of the fog/smog! The glimpses we could see though were menacing and imposing, yet tantalisingly exciting.

We had a traditional Asian breakfast, egg fried rice and some noodle dish before getting a taxi that wasn’t there to make an extortionate amount of money off us. Realistically, it would’ve only been a couple of quid more! Damn our stinginess! This arguably turned to be our most regrettable decision of the trip…

Once we got dropped off, we had a quick tinkle break in the most grotesque, fly-ridden holes in the floor we’ve ever bare witnessed to before heading up the stairs to what we presumed was the cable-car. Four hours later and a lot of confusion, sweat and more sweat, we’d realised that we had gone through the “back-route” & arrived at the North Peak. More frustratingly, the infamous plank trail was at the complete opposite side but our fitness fanaticism ensured we weren’t overly dejected. A couple of over-priced but well earned boiled eggs and noodle pots at the summit and we were ready to head on through to the next Peak. We were conscious of time as we had no idea what time we could stay till foolishly so we must’ve looked like frantic British tourists on a serious mission!

A little treat was bumping into our pal Jeremy on the way to the plank trail who we were meant to meet in the morning but couldn’t find! Small world we live in… We caught up with him and he presented us with a load of hyperbole about the distance to the plank trail. Either we are power walkers or he was full of shiiiitttt! I’d go with the former…

We got the plank trail and as much as I’d of loved to be all masculine and not bothered about it, I was bricking it. The lead up to the plank trail was minuscule, yet the local Chinese were like a swarm of ants how they economically passed us without any consideration to the midget-high fence that stopped certain death. The inevitably poor safety features were enough to keep you alive and whilst most people would enjoy the thrill seeking adventure of dangling on the side of a mountain, I was distressed and papping myself. The ladder down was torture due to it’s severity and waiting time. The acutely placed photographer then got our snap, I was dry humping the mountain side and counting down the moments to getting off. Once we had left the prank trail,

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Mt Huashan getting familiarised with my crotch…

I instantly regretted not having more of a backbone but oh well, maybe next time?

We rushed around the rest of the mountain and of course got some glorious selfies before heading off back home. We were both exhausted and slept on the way back, only to be kindly awoken by a group of Chinese school children asking for a plethora of photos. I suppose this is what my super stardom will be like…

All in all, a really good day and a must in mainland China!


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